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| Category: Personal Fufillment |
Date published: March 29, 2005 |
This is a loaded question comprised of a myriad of reasons, but they all start with the frame of mind that I find myself in at the moment I pick up my pen. Emotions play the biggest part; ever changing life around us, fragments of thought needing to be expressed at any given moment. Daydreaming in a meeting and finding out later that I doodled on the corner of the page. What did the pictograph speak to me afterward?
Perhaps in a moment of quietness, an unnoticed memory from the past pops into the mind whispering it's lament in my ear and I realize then, that those small moments we take for granted brings us inspiration at another time in our life, for indeed our life is filled with millions of fragmented memories. Such things like, running as a child in a meadow of dandelions with my dad and stopping to pick one, being encouraged to blow at the downy wisps and make a wish, as we watch the little angel wings float away to Heaven. Or for instance the very first time getting up and singing in front of an auditorium full of people, the emotions felt in that split second of realization that my voice has to leave my throat, if only I can get past the lump that seemed to have materialize from nowhere a moment before. Walking past a door and hearing laughter bubbling from within as they play with teddies and teapots and you recognize innocence in its purest form. I could go on and on about fragments of memories.
I love to be outside in the great outdoors as much as possible, and hardly will I be seen without the company of my camera. At any given moment, something catches our eye and brings beauty at a standstill, but for only a moment and it's gone. I try to capture some of those moments and will later pick up my brushes or pencil and try to re-create it. Once the picture is finished, it more often then not speaks to me, sometimes in more then one angle and I'm compelled to write the words that flow from the canvas to blank sheets of paper. I surprise even myself at the volumes that have flowed because of this. It sort of reinforces the idea that, "a picture speaks a thousand words".
Music is also a big factor in my writing. I have it playing at all hours of the day and night; I'm not one that watches much television. At any given moment a particular melody will sometimes spur my muse to write from the emotions it is relaying to my heart. Maybe it's a violin or a simple acoustic guitar solo, but I feel in that moment that it is speaking to my soul and I have to put the feelings on paper.
The reasons are many as I have said in the beginning, but there is one constant that never changes. My ultimate goal from writing is to somehow bring whoever reads my humble work a moment of peace, to touch their heart and mind and leave a lasting impression of whom I am. When that happens, I feel that I have done something worthwhile with my life.
© Sandi Alford 2005
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